The Inside Poop on Women

Pooping Is a Feminist Issue and is “ripe” for getting it out. The female malady of poop retention and feminist poop shame is a serious issue. Take the time visit the link in order to fully understand the discomfort that women endure.

“Is this every woman’s secret? …. Sure, it’s hard to talk about human excrement or flatulence without jokes — nothing is funnier than that which is uncomfortable.”

Men should probe this modern day problem, butt we must stand apart in order to observe from distant perspective to see what comes out:

Could the prevalence of poop retention be related to women not relaxing enough to have orgasms?

What about the long lines at women’s public restrooms? What are the causes? Could it be that women will not suffer the indignity of having their derriere come in contact with the disgusting toilet seat, or is it the necessity of “The Stance.”

It seems that these matters have contributed to the need for “potty parity” – more toilets in women’s restrooms (so women won’t have to wait in line so long) compared to the number in men’s restrooms. Maybe this problem is made dire by women that have to use the public toilets to poop since they are too prissy to do it at home. How they can crap using “The Stance” I do not know, but maybe a double layer of toilet paper is sufficient for these occasions. Also keep in mind that many women not emptying their bladders properly leading to other problems, including urinary tract infections and driving up the cost of healthcare.

Of course pooping is a feminist issue, since men are obviously to blame when women cannot perform their bodily functions around men. How repressive the men are, since they couldn’t care one way or the other about women’s defecation habits! On behalf of all men, I apologize for the uncaring questions men have asked such as, “What crawled up your asshole and died?” Men got that part wrong; it was just plain old poop retention!

How can men make the world safe for women to poop properly? I think education is the answer. Men should advocate for a government program to teach women to piss and poop, in public facilities and in their homes and wherever nature calls. It should be compassionate and sensitive to the emotions of women. I think a good marketing name would be “Dear Women, Nature is Calling.” The motto can be “Do what comes naturally when you hear the call of nature.” This decorum would respect the delicate sensitivities of the fairer sex.

I have heard many men complain about having to put up with a woman “full of crap.” From a male perspective, this seems to be a serious problem. After years of denial about this, the feminist women finally admit that it is true; a lot of women are FULL OF CRAP. Somebody should do something about this and that is why men must insist on a new federally funded program. Many have heard about VAWA (Violence Against Women Act) and now we need TWAPA (Teaching Women About Pooping Act).

In the meantime, here is some valuable information for women:

Men do know that women poop, because it is a logical consequence of eating. Even some women are admitting that “shit happens.”

Men are in favor of women pooping (but it might be too much to say we are behind women on this matter). We men would like to say we would stand beside you to help you with this problem, we would like to say we will be there to hold your hand, but sadly few men are that that committed.

But men do know there are many benefits to men when women poop. If women just pooped, then maybe they wouldn’t have to spread their crap around wherever they go. And the smell when the farts cannot be contained! Whew… after three days of holding it in. Damn!

Of course no man should ever mention having to smell her nasty farts in bed because she was too prissy to take a crap for a couple of days. This shit has got to stop! Oh… wait, that is the problem…. I mean… stopping and waiting is the problem. I think in their wisdom the MGTOWs have the solution when they want women “to go.”

But men also know that men fart more women and men don’t care.

 

Speaking of retention, women complain at certain times of the month about water retention. Could this be poop retention, caused by poop shame?

Does the modern woman walk like a man because she must waddle due to poop retention? (I can imagine that a feminine walk is difficult when also concentrating on keeping butt cheeks tight and asshole puckered. This could also contribute to the number of women walking around looking like they have a pickle up their butt. Maybe it is just poop!)

TWAPA should include funding for studies to investigate these manifestations.

How exactly can the ordinary man show his support? It is quite easy; men should openly and freely rip a good one and smile in relief. Show her how easy it is and how relaxed you feel after.

A married guy I knew in college told me that his wife was complaining that he ripped farts in public. She advised him to go to the bathroom when he felt the need. He took her advice the next time she was taking a bath. For some reason, she didn’t appreciate him taking her advice. The lesson is that men should just continue to let it fly whenever and wherever, as is normal. She might be initially offended but the look of satisfaction on her face after she learns to just let it go will be worth it.

Also that was actually female crap about male homophobia at the end of that article. Continue to be proud of a excreting a nice long monster turd and make sure to have her take a look to admire your effort. After all, nothing is more arousing to a woman than a man she can admire and respect.